Requests, offers, permission and invitations

Start with what you want to do

The same words can do different jobs. Can I carry that box? is an offer when you want to help. Can I leave my coat here? asks permission when you want to use someone's space. Read the situation, not just the first word.

Build the question

Can, could, may, will, would and shall are modal verbs. They help another verb. Put the modal before the person in a question. Use the base form, the verb without to, such as bring or wait.

• Could you bring an extra chair?
• May we wait inside?

Do not add do or does before the modal. Do not add -s to it with he or she.

• Could she send the address to me?

In would you like to come, like is the verb directly after would. It has no to before it. To come comes after like. These are two different steps.

• Would you like to visit the museum with us?

Requests: ask someone to do something

Use can you, could you, will you or would you followed by the base verb. Cambridge describes can you and will you requests as more informal. Could you and would you are polite, less direct choices.

Could and would do not put these requests in the past. Could you check the booking? asks for help now or later.

Can you is not automatically rude. British Council notes that your voice also matters. You do not make a request polite simply by choosing one modal. Please can help, but the situation and how you speak still matter.

To ask for something, you can use can I have or could I have followed by the thing. May I have is a more formal choice.

• Could I have a copy of the timetable, please?
• May I have your reference number, please?

I'd like is another polite way to say what you want. I want is more direct and can sound impolite in a request. It is not a grammar error.

• I'd like two tickets for the afternoon tour, please.

Asking, giving and refusing permission

Permission means that something is allowed. Use can I or can we to ask. Could I or could we is a more formal, polite choice. May I or may we is more formal again in the British Council comparison.

• Can we use the kitchen?
• Could I borrow the office key?
• May I record this interview?

Can I is accepted for permission. It does not have to mean a question about your ability. You do not need to replace every can I with may I.

To give actual permission now, use can or the more formal may. Do not simply repeat could from Could I...? as if you were giving permission.

• A: Could I leave my bicycle here? B: Yes, you can. The answer gives permission now.
• Visitors may use the side entrance. A formal permission statement.

Could can describe past permission or an imagined possibility in other contexts. The rule here is about giving someone permission now, not a ban on every sentence with you could.

Use can't or the more formal may not to refuse permission. You can also explain the limit rather than giving a bare no.

• You can't park in this space. It is reserved.
• You may not enter this room without a pass.
• I'm sorry, you can't use that computer today. It is being repaired.

May not here means not allowed. In a different context, may not can mean perhaps not. See May and might: possibility and other meanings for possibility.

Offers: say that you can help

Use can I or can we to offer help. Can I get you something? offers to bring or buy it in that situation.

• Can I take your suitcase upstairs?
• Can I get you a clean towel?

Shall I followed by a verb is another offer. Shall we can suggest something to do together. British Council notes that this use of shall is less used in American English. Can I and would you like are useful alternatives.

• Shall I put these flowers in water?
• Shall we walk to the station together? A suggestion for both of you.

You can also offer with I can, I could or I'll. I'll is the short form of I will.

• I can explain the first step if you like.
• I could collect the parcel for you.
• I'll carry the empty chairs back.

Would you like me to followed by a verb asks whether the other person wants you to do something. Would you like to asks about something the other person would do. Keep the person doing the action clear.

• Would you like me to call a taxi? I would make the call.
• Would you like to call a taxi? You would make the call.

Would you like and I'd like

Use would you like followed by a thing to offer it. Use would you like to followed by a verb to invite someone to do something.

• Would you like another blanket?
• Would you like to join our walking group?

I'd like means I would like. Use a thing after it, or to followed by a verb. The short form 'd means would here, not had.

• I'd like a table near the window, please.
• I'd like to try the smaller size.

Do you like asks about a general preference. Would you like offers something or asks what someone wants in this situation.

After would like, use to play, not playing, for this action pattern. With plain like, both playing and to play can be possible. Do not turn the would-like rule into a ban on like to play.

An invitation can use other forms too. Do you want to is more informal. Why don't you can invite someone to join you.

• Do you want to come to the market with us?
• Why don't you join us after the film?

Come and sit with us is a direct invitation. You must visit us sometime can be a warm invitation, not a command about a rule. The meaning depends on the situation. See Imperatives and let's: instructions, orders and suggestions and Have to and must: obligation for these other forms.

Answer the purpose, not just the grammar

Match your reply to the request or offer. Yes, please accepts something offered to you. Of course or No problem can agree to a request for help. I'd love to accepts an invitation to do something.

You can also say Yes, I'd like to after an invitation. To can stand at the end when the action is clear. You do not need to repeat the whole action.

• A: Would you like to visit the exhibition? B: Yes, I'd like to.

Thanks by itself can accept an invitation. Say No, thanks clearly if you are declining. A refusal can include a short reason, but it does not need a complicated excuse.

Longer requests and mind

Do you think you could followed by a verb is another way to ask for help. In a formal message, I would be grateful if you could followed by a verb is possible too.

• Do you think you could check these figures?
• I would be grateful if you could confirm the delivery date.

A negative question with a positive question tag can make a request when you are not sure the other person can help. The tag is the short question at the end. This is still a request, not a statement that help is impossible.

• You couldn't lend me a charger, could you?

Would you mind means roughly would you object to this? When you want the other person to act, put an -ing form after mind. Do you mind followed by an -ing form is also possible.

• Would you mind moving your chair a little?
• Would you mind not using your phone during the talk? You ask someone to stop or avoid the action.

To ask permission for your own action, use would you mind if I followed by a past form, or do you mind if I followed by a present form. The past form here is a polite way to ask now, not a statement about yesterday.

• Would you mind if I opened this door?
• Do you mind if I put my bag on the shelf?

You may also meet mind me or mind my followed by an -ing form. That person does the action.

• Would you mind me opening the curtains? I want to open them, not ask you to open them.

With a mind question, No, not at all means I don't mind, so it can give permission or agree to help. It does not mean a refusal. If you object, make that clear rather than relying on a bare yes or no.

• A: Would you mind if I sat beside you? B: No, not at all. The speaker is happy for you to sit there.
• A: Would you mind if I used this desk? B: I'm afraid it's reserved. The speaker does not give permission.

Might I is a more formal or tentative permission question too. See May and might: possibility and other meanings for more on might.

Please: useful, but not a guarantee (further detail)

Please at the end is a useful starting pattern for a request. It can also come earlier. Cambridge notes that please in the middle, especially when stressed, can make a request stronger. Do not learn that please always makes every sentence gentle.

• Could you leave the gate open, please?
• Could you please leave the gate open? This position can make the request stronger.

Your tone of voice matters too. British Council's speaking example explains that intonation can change whether a request sounds polite or rude. A written pattern is a guide, not a guarantee about how every listener will react.

What comes next

See Can, could and be able to: ability, possibility and permission for ability and other can/could uses, May and might: possibility and other meanings for permission and possibility, Would: forms, wishes, requests and past meanings for other would meanings, Will and shall: forms, predictions, decisions and offers for will/shall, Question tags: isn't it? don't you? for tags and Embedded questions: do you know where..., I don't know what... for longer questions such as Could you tell me where...?